the_campus | (no subject)

[A hand knocks on the door slowly. Knock. Knock. A slow rapping sound that seems almost tentative.]

Kai-kun? Are you home?

[Ryou's soft tones slip through the closed door. He hasn't seen Kai around for a bit now. It's worrying. Surely he hasn't disappeared?

Knock knock. He's having to hold the plate of cookies in his hand with his injured arm.]

Kai-kun?

[And that voice makes him freeze for a second, cautiously looking up from the paper as if Ryou can see him through the door. Does he want to answer that?

Nope.

Just going to go back to what he's doing here...for maybe another five seconds before he hits himself in the face with the sketchbook. Coward.]

...Hang on a second.

[Tossing the sketchbook aside, Kai shrugs out of the blanket and goes to the door, leaning against it. Still not too hot on the whole opening the door idea...damn. Sighing, he gives the lock a twist and yanks the door open to peer at Ryou. Don't mind the shorts and creepily appropriate t-shirt kid brother, it's as dressed as he's getting today.]

Kai-kun... [Ryou lets out a sigh of relief, before giving him one of his fondest smiles. Thank goodness... Kai isn't gone.]

Uhm. I assumed that if you were here, you were probably pretty upset to lock yourself away like this... So I brought you these to cheer you up a little...

[He holds up the plate of cookies like an offering. His fingers tremble a little on the side of the plate from the dull ache, but other than that, he doesn't give any sign that he's hurting at all. Even his legs are steady, despite the gash that the spirit endured there on the roof later. Ryou's getting more used to pain. That's probably not a good thing.]

I-if you don't want to see me, I'll understand. The spirit probably did something to you, right? But please at least take these.

[Kai almost smiles back out of reflex before catching himself. Geeze, this kid. Instead he just gives an awkward shrug.]

'Upset' might be an understatement...you made me cookies?

[What perking up at the sight of goodies, that never happened. It does fade a little as he notices the trembling, the faint smile that had been creeping up disappearing.]

More like I-

[Damn it Ryou, seriously. Kai takes a step back, opening the door wider, before waving him in.]

Get in here already before I screw up your hair and make you drop those.

Ahaha! That'd be kind of mean, since I made them especially! You'd have to eat them anyway since you made me drop them!

[Ryou can't help but laugh gently. Kai really doesn't change, huh... Trying his best not to limp, he slips through the gap and into Kai's dormitory, going over to set the plate of cookies on the table. He's wearing the spirit's coat again, the long black thing enough to cover his scars as well as his injuries. It's a weird look for him, coupled with his usual jeans and t-shirt ensemble.]

...If you don't want to talk about it, I won't ask. But until you feel better, I'm going to bring you desserts every day.

I might keep the floor clean but I'm still not eating off it. Surge though... [A tiny grin almost slips through at the image of his dog sucking up the cookies like a vacuum.] Thanks for going to the trouble, though.

[He eyes Ryou suspiciously as he moves, not quite sure if he's actually seeing a limp or if it's just his guilt making him see things. Shaking his head, he nudges the door shut.]

You look like a vampire with that thing on.

[Really, he almost does. Kai drifts over to the table and studies the cookies for a long moment before picking one up. They're not going to bite.]

You don't have to do that.

[Not talking about it seems good. Not thinking about it is even better. But...]

What do you know about what happened? I mean, what've you heard? [Whether from the Creeper or anyone else, he's curious. Kai himself isn't sure what's been going around.]

...eheh. It's not mine, but 'he' doesn't seem to mind if I borrow his clothes.

[Reluctantly, he reaches up to slip it off. His usual short-sleeved shirts don't really hide the bandage around his arm, and he sits down slowly on the couch. It's a shaky movement at best.]

Uhm. I know some kind of creatures apparently attacked the place, but I don't know any details. Apparently Vaughn-san and I were both attacked by some kind of shadow creatures. And Vaughn-san fought a dragon as well.

I just woke up after everything was over with. 'He' said you would probably be feeling pretty bad, but he didn't go into details. He was acting really weird anyway. Weirder than usual.

Well that's only fair, since he's borrowing you all the time. [Just ignore that flash of anger, Ryou, Kai's trying to. Eating the cookie helps. These are better than his, he's almost jealous.

Seeing the bandage and the way he moves leads to another cookie being munched on, because distractions are good. But he can't just stand there inhaling cookies all day, so after the second he goes to join Ryou on the couch.]

That- those were Heartless. It was my fault. I called them.

['Because I was sick of Bakura's crap and murder seemed like the best idea I've ever had' almost follows, but nope, not saying that. He cringes a little at the mention of the dragon, suddenly finding the wall across the room to be the most interesting thing he's ever seen.]

Huh. Was he.

[Stupid, stupid, stupid.]

Un, he was. Like he was more giggly and less lucid than usual. Colder too.

[Ryou rests his hands on his legs, sitting back. Kai really did seem angry at the spirit... was this his fault? He was the one that had gotten possessed, after all. And if he hadn't become Kai's friend, would Kai have gotten this angry? No, that was just crazy talk. He couldn't let himself think something like that.]

Heart...less... [Scary... Kai had called something like that? But for Kai to seclude himself afterwards... He must be feeling pretty guilty. He's not getting away without some scolding, but Ryou isn't going to dig the knife in any deeper. He knows from experience that guilt digs the knife in all by itself. He puts on a stern face, though his tone is as friendly as ever.]

Kai-kun, that was pretty reckless! Maybe I should take the cookies away!

[Note to self: Keep his little creepers away from the big one.] Giggly...? That's just wrong. Not that the whole thing wasn't...

[It's a good thing Kai's not a mind reader, because if he knew what was going through Ryou's head he'd have whapped him for it. He's still staring at the wall as Ryou speaks again, and he glances over when the tone doesn't match the words. What?]

...Scary face.

[He's expecting him to protest the cookie threat, right? Instead Kai just blinks at the other boy. How can he be trying to make light of this?]

I was going to kill him, you know. That was the whole point. Killing his stupid Creeper ass by taking his Heart, and then you would've been dead, and I didn't even think about that...and here you are threatening to take my cookies away. Shouldn't I be getting disowned or something? Family doesn't try and kill each other...usually, anyway.

I know. To do something like that... You... would have to be really out of control. So angry and hurt that you didn't think of anything or anyone else. Because Kai-kun isn't like that normally.

[Ryou's voice is serious and quiet. Lifting a hand, he covers the bandage on his arm. It's almost in the same place as back when the spirit stabbed him, back in Battle City. Hah... the irony.]

What you did was foolish. And it's not something that you should stop feeling bad for. At the very least, you should make sure it never happens again.

Even if I really want to live... I'm willing to die if it means my friends are safe from him. But dying here doesn't mean dying. Killing him wouldn't do anything. And other people got hurt too. It's just a pointless cycle.

[His fingers tense a little.]

But you're not a bad person. Even if you did something bad like that. And I'm sure that you're already hurting yourself more than anyone else can punish you. So what good will it do to get mad at you? It'll just make you hurt worse. And I don't want to make you hurt or make you go away.

I've already lost enough family without you disappearing on me too.

...I really do take after my mom.

[That comes out a bitter grumble, then he's quiet as he listens, trying not to sink into the couch as he watches Ryou touch the bandage. He definitely thinks he's going to regret this for the rest of his life; no worries there. As far as making sure it never happens again...

This conversation is certainly going to help with that.]

Ryou...

[That last part just rips right into him, and Kai shifts uncomfortably, turning away. He actually hasn't cried once since he realized what he did, but hearing that? He might just start now, if the sniffle is any indication. He shoves it down quickly, instead swinging back around to throw his arms around the other boy in a hug.]

-!

[Surprise flashes across his face at the unexpected hug, and he brings his arms up to wrap them around Kai's back. Kai sounded like he was going to burst into tears or something. Ryou has enough tact not to comment on that.

That doesn't mean he isn't going to mother a little.]

Now, now...

[He pats Kai on the back soothingly.]

I'm sure your mom's really nice too! She raised you, after all!

[He's not going to cry, damn it. He's not a little kid anymore. Usually. The mothering's kind of nice, though he almost snorts with laughter at that comment.]

She's weird. And she never wanted kids. But she did want me.

[That makes more sense than it sounds like. Kai lets himself be hugged just a bit longer before pulling away, his expression somewhere between grumpy and embarrassed.]

She was only around until just before I turned nine, then she disappeared. She did her best while she was there, though. She had a lot to make up for...she wouldn't have wanted this for me. She did some awful things with her Darkness too.

[Some of which Kai knows about because he asked his dad, but most of that knowledge came from listening at keyholes. At least he outgrew that habit.]

I see... [Disappeared, huh... That's sad. Ryou knows quite well how much that can mess someone up. But she sounds like she did her best as a parent until then. He can't fault her for that.]

She still sounds like a good person. It sounds like she wanted better things for you. Even if this Darkness power you two have is really kind of scary, and even if she's weird.

[He really wonders what sort of awful things Mrs Jaeger did though to make even Kai say that. And what was she like? And why did she disappear? But talking about it might make Kai feel worse.]

I still don't know why. I've been looking for her since my world fell. Couldn't before then, I didn't know I could use the Corridors. That was-

['Creepy as hell' works. Kai shrugs.] Disturbing. But they got me away, so.

[He smiles suddenly, but it's a little tired. Good was subjective, wasn't it.] 'Good' people don't watch their parents get taken by Heartless and do nothing about it. Not that she could have, back then. They deserved it anyway.

[Considering that Kai's stance has always been that no one deserves that, hearing him say it is probably on the high side of creepy.] But she made sure I had a dad to look up to, guess that falls under good.

[He wants another cookie suddenly. Does Ryou want one? He'll just assume the answer to the unasked question is 'yes' and fetch a couple.]

[Those words send a shiver down his spine, and he's grateful for the distraction of the cookie.]

Sorry. I didn't mean to dredge up bad memories.

[The fact that he's nibbling at it instead of just chomping it down shows that he does feel kind of bad.]

It's okay, it's not really upsetting. I mean, it makes me mad knowing what kind of people they were, that it could drive her to- but it was long before I was born. And from what I understand, it was actually one of her best memories.

[While Ryou's only nibbling, Kai's simply turning his cookie around in his fingers, studying it. He can tell Ryou feels kind of bad about this, but...shouldn't he try and talk about some of it? It's been hiding from it that partially lead to the earlier clusterfuck of doom.]

But-

[Naw. He doesn't need to dump any of this on him, Ryou deals with enough. Shaking his head with a faint smile, he stops wearing grooves in his cookie and just eats it.]

These are really good, you know.

Ah- Thank you. [Ryou brightens a little, smiling.] I meant what I said about making you more, earlier. Even if I don't need to, I'd like to. I really like cooking.

[He fidgets a little. There's something of an amused note in his voice.]

Considering how much I eat, it's probably a good thing. If I didn't care for cooking, I'd be eating fast food every day and then I probably couldn't afford rent.

[Like he'd ever be that irresponsible. But still.]